Johnny the Homicidal Maniac

For those of you who have never read Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, I suggest that you do so. Though it’s definitely not for EVERYONE, there are a lot of things in there that pretty much anyone will really read into and probably laugh their ass off at. There’s a lot of shit in there that even the writer mocks as being very typical, angsty prose, but there’s a very fluid thought process behind it. Not only is the material in JTHM very funny, but the small tidbits that are added in help keep you interested. Some of the material is senseless, but it’s made that way for a reason.

The foreward is really great, but it’s way too long to type out, so I suggest that you get a copy of the director’s cut if you want a quick and enjoyable read, though the actual comics have lots of things in them that it the director’s cut lack. I wish that I still had the full comics, but as my luck has it, half of my issues are being borrowed(along with every other Jhonen comic that I own) and the other half were stolen from me by someone I was nice enough to lend them to.

Anyway, these are my favourite quotes and pictures from Nny(Johnny’s nickname in the comics). I know that it might be kind of hard to follow without knowing the full plot, but that’s even more reason for you to read it. :D

PS- italics are titles of certain segments and (stuff in parentheses inside of the quotes is the stuff in side bubbles). Sorry if the pictures suck, but I had to use my scanner.

“Well, I’d really hate to miss Oprah Windy, but this whole mutilation thing is pretty upsetting, so ask away.

(Next, men who eat human waste, and the women who love to kiss them!)”

“Does this look like heaven?”

His house number is 777. :)

“Movies, books, T.V., music- they’re all just entertainment, not guidebooks for damning yourself!”

“Johnny the Suicidal Maniac: Another 2A.M.

Oh. It’s such a beautiful night. I think I’ll kill myself. … Another one of these nights.”

“Things That Make Noise

They make so much noise. I try to wait until I’m out of the room before I start laughing. … A blur of sweating, screaming, crying, human drama. But, every once in a while, they say things that sound like words. They make me think about what I’m doing. The noises make me so uncomfortable. So uncomfortable that sometimes I wonder why I just don’t get myself a pair of earplugs.”

Goth Girl(Tess): “ Why is it whenever were not talking about being discriminated by people for the way we look we make fun of other people? I mean, what makes you any different from those jock-holes who were laughing at your hair that one time?”

Goth Guy(Dillon): “It’s not like we talk about anyone important. Some people just ask for it … Besides, if we talked about anything else, we might expose the fact that most of our arrogance is based on exploiting a fashionable alienation, rather than on anything substantial.”

Tess: “Oh yeah. HEY! Look at that fat girl!!”

Johnny: “We all assign a voice to the aspects of ourselves and I remember you always being there from the start. So you’ve seen what I’ve seen. Felt it all. The people laughing … and living their petty lives.”

Nailbunny: “A world defined by its daytime talk shows.”

Johnny: “Ohhh… *sniff* …I wish … I wish someone would just switch me off and … fix me. Bunny?”

Nailbunny: “Yes, Nny?”

Johnny: “I’m not happy.”

“Dear Diary, I seem to be dead.”

“Sometimes you can cry until there is nothing left in you. You can scream and curse to where your throat rebels and ruptures. You can pray all you want to whatever God you think will listen. And, still, it makes NO difference. It goes on, with no sign as to when it might release you. And you know that if it ever did relent … It would not be because it cared.”

These are the renditions of God and Satan in JTHM. They make me giggle. Satan also shows up again in a different form, but you’ll have to read it to see it. :DDDD

“There is a disturbing association in your mind, between feeling and weakness. … Your body screams for INPUT!! I am the sun on your face, the touch of soft skin! The feel of real cotton! I am the rope around your neck, a feather across your back! Blood and toothpaste! I am the sensation of all of these things!”

Johnny: “I am a slave to nothing …!”

Obey: “There is no choice. You’re always a slave to something.”

“Dear Die-ary, The passions that drive us should be the ones we respect and admire. To feel contempt for one’s own motivations is a vulgar thing. Too often, it seems, I’ve succumbed to less than admirable compulsions driven by this furiously reprehensible machine of mine. So many things inside that I can do without- desires and urges and whatnot. So extraneous. By the time I write in this book again, I hope to be as cold as the moon that lights this page.”

"Dear Die-ary, There’s nothing terribly wrong with feeling lost, so long as that feeling precedes some plan on your part to actually do something about it. … I can’t say I’m very pleased with where my life is just now … But I can’t help but look forward to where it’s going.”