The party Rachel threw for me was really fantastic. Seeing her drunk was probably the silliest ever. She was still the concerned hostess("Are you sure you're having fun?") as usual, but she still cracked me up. I got to talk to people that I never really talked to before AND got to look at some really pretty, extremely sweet boys. :D
I'm glad that I get to hang out with boys and don't have to worry about shit. Ahh, I love being single.
Doesn't mean I don't hate it a little, though.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
If Hulu would lay off the fucking ads, I would love it. I just want to watch Dead Like Me.
Any suggestions?
On again - Off again. I'm really tired of it, but I can't let it go.
Good books needed to keep me going, please?
Tomorrow is day13 of 13 in my in-a-row stint. Can't wait for Monday.
In German, there's a single word for "the day after tomorrow:" übermorgen.
There's also one for "the day before yesterday:" vorgestern.
Straight and to the point. Very forward.
I like it.
Any suggestions?
On again - Off again. I'm really tired of it, but I can't let it go.
Good books needed to keep me going, please?
Tomorrow is day13 of 13 in my in-a-row stint. Can't wait for Monday.
In German, there's a single word for "the day after tomorrow:" übermorgen.
There's also one for "the day before yesterday:" vorgestern.
Straight and to the point. Very forward.
I like it.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Hallmark is going through a gigantor transition. We're took down Father's Day, moved the Kid's Wall and are putting up Summer Sale items, the new Girlfriend Collection AND the ornament wall for Premiere weekend. X_x It's nice having stuff to do, but also very tiring.
I'm actually really working on putting a really big package together for my Germans. They sent me an email recently to tell me how much they missed me and that Felix died. I got really upset because I miss them a bunch and Felix is gone and they're all growing up and I haven't sent them ANYTHING, etc. The package is going well, but I need someone to come with me one of these days and shop. :D
We need to plan for the festivities in August. Sometime after the 11th? Or when the fuck ever. I just want to ask it off and put it in my calendar so I have a deadline.
Going to see my family tomorrow in the cemetery. Mom is accompanying me. I renovated my grandma's tropical MuMu and now it's real mod. Haha. I'm going to wear it and take yellow roses. I'm pretty stoked.
Birthday was great. Woke up, went to Goodwill, ate at Chipotle, chilled at home, went to the party in Muncie. It was super fun. I got to dress 70's and drink with my family and dance and such. After Muncie, I went to Gammon's house with the boy and drank more. Played Kings, smoked some decent chronic and passed the fuck out. Father's Day I went to see my cousin before he moves to fucking Italy with his family for the Air Force. His girls finally started to not be scared of me. They both let me hold them and love on them, so that was positive. That and I just got to see all of my family.
Turns out, grandma Jenny has ... Chronic Kidney something or other and is in stage 3 of 5, so she's still in a lot of pain, but maybe they'll prescribe her something she can actually afford. I just am not ready for her to die and I don't think she is either, but for now, it's nothing to worry too much about. Uncle Larry's MS is getting really bad too and I know I'm not ready for him to go and my dad certainly isn't. I just don't understand why such wonderful people have to suffer so much. He was a Navy doctor and is a fantastic father and a fantastic man and he's honest and worked hard all of his life just so he could be restrained in a wheelchair, unable to hold his own drink because of the tremors. He looked so sad the whole night because hardly anyone was talking to him. :/ I can't do this to myself and sorry for randomly rambling about it.
Good news, the boy is being really good and I think I've made headway, but knock on wood because I always think I'm making headway. At the party he wasn't very chatty and wouldn't dance with me, but he just left and walked and smoked to blow-off some steam whenever it was bothering him. If things keep the way they are, then maybe things will start to work-out better. I've been happy for the past few nights and that's very new to me, so I'm glad.
Tonight I'm home and glad of it, just wish that I had been able to see someone other than family, but I didn't put out any effort and no one else does because no one ever knows where I am.
I think I've gone on long enough. I'm going to bed and I get to cuddle with my Odie tonight! :D I can't wait to have an apartment of my own with a dog of my own.
PS - I miss you, Ashleigh Matthews. I wanted to mention that I like Prince now and would like to watch some of his movies and listen to music of his with you and you can tell me all about him. :D If you want to, of course. I might call you out of the blue sometime and come pick you up and we can shop for my Germans and for August and stuff. Or whatev. Crafts? I'm totally down for a pit-stop at Michael's to pick something up to do. I dunno. Ideas?
I'm actually really working on putting a really big package together for my Germans. They sent me an email recently to tell me how much they missed me and that Felix died. I got really upset because I miss them a bunch and Felix is gone and they're all growing up and I haven't sent them ANYTHING, etc. The package is going well, but I need someone to come with me one of these days and shop. :D
We need to plan for the festivities in August. Sometime after the 11th? Or when the fuck ever. I just want to ask it off and put it in my calendar so I have a deadline.
Going to see my family tomorrow in the cemetery. Mom is accompanying me. I renovated my grandma's tropical MuMu and now it's real mod. Haha. I'm going to wear it and take yellow roses. I'm pretty stoked.
Birthday was great. Woke up, went to Goodwill, ate at Chipotle, chilled at home, went to the party in Muncie. It was super fun. I got to dress 70's and drink with my family and dance and such. After Muncie, I went to Gammon's house with the boy and drank more. Played Kings, smoked some decent chronic and passed the fuck out. Father's Day I went to see my cousin before he moves to fucking Italy with his family for the Air Force. His girls finally started to not be scared of me. They both let me hold them and love on them, so that was positive. That and I just got to see all of my family.
Turns out, grandma Jenny has ... Chronic Kidney something or other and is in stage 3 of 5, so she's still in a lot of pain, but maybe they'll prescribe her something she can actually afford. I just am not ready for her to die and I don't think she is either, but for now, it's nothing to worry too much about. Uncle Larry's MS is getting really bad too and I know I'm not ready for him to go and my dad certainly isn't. I just don't understand why such wonderful people have to suffer so much. He was a Navy doctor and is a fantastic father and a fantastic man and he's honest and worked hard all of his life just so he could be restrained in a wheelchair, unable to hold his own drink because of the tremors. He looked so sad the whole night because hardly anyone was talking to him. :/ I can't do this to myself and sorry for randomly rambling about it.
Good news, the boy is being really good and I think I've made headway, but knock on wood because I always think I'm making headway. At the party he wasn't very chatty and wouldn't dance with me, but he just left and walked and smoked to blow-off some steam whenever it was bothering him. If things keep the way they are, then maybe things will start to work-out better. I've been happy for the past few nights and that's very new to me, so I'm glad.
Tonight I'm home and glad of it, just wish that I had been able to see someone other than family, but I didn't put out any effort and no one else does because no one ever knows where I am.
I think I've gone on long enough. I'm going to bed and I get to cuddle with my Odie tonight! :D I can't wait to have an apartment of my own with a dog of my own.
PS - I miss you, Ashleigh Matthews. I wanted to mention that I like Prince now and would like to watch some of his movies and listen to music of his with you and you can tell me all about him. :D If you want to, of course. I might call you out of the blue sometime and come pick you up and we can shop for my Germans and for August and stuff. Or whatev. Crafts? I'm totally down for a pit-stop at Michael's to pick something up to do. I dunno. Ideas?
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Blah, blah, relationship bullshit, blah. I don't want to talk about it.
My family might be able to come with me to see Grandma and grandpa, so that's positive.
I feel lame because I'm planning on buying gifts pre-made, instead of making them. I guess I just don't feel like I have the energy or inspiration to make anything this year.
"If you said goodbye to me tonight,
there would still be music left to write.
What else could I do?
I'm so inspired by you,
that hasn't happened for the longest time."
I feel like I need that person in my life.
"What can you do when your dreams come true,
and it's not quite like you planned?
What have you done to be losing the one,
You held so tight in your hand?
...
You're afraid you might fall out of fashion,
and you're feeling cold and small.
Any kind of love without passion,
Ain't no kind of loving at all."
True story.
Lyrics are bombarding me, sorry. I'm going for one more, then back on subject.
"I guess this is our last goodbye,
but you don't care, so I won't cry.
You'll be sorry when I'm dead,
cause all this guilt will be on your head.
I guess you'd call it suicide,
but I'm too full to swallow my pride."
That last bit is just badass. Personal opinion...
All of the above are from memory. I'm proud of me. :D
Okay, I am really ready for gift giving. It's like I'm spending money on me(instead of other peoples rent), but I'm spending it on other people, so it's almost more fun because I don't have to find a place to put my new things. I get to give them to people I -insert word that relates to love/care here- about.
I'm trying really hard to not be really creepy and attached to you folks, but my younger personality is seeping through. I was going to think of an awesome analogy, but when it comes down to it, I just get super attached to people because I'm scared they're going to leave me, so I squeeze all the juice out of it that I can. That fails me in a number of ways: I freak people out, I end up getting hurt, and I exhaust myself/forget to love and care for me. Basically, I'm a creeper.
This is really how my mind works. This is a pretty fluid model of all of the things that have crossed my mind while typing.
-goes to get cola and possibly nachos-
I swapped the nachos out for my Odie Joe. :) He's such a sweetie.
I think I'll turn in so that he can sleep. Goodnight.
My family might be able to come with me to see Grandma and grandpa, so that's positive.
I feel lame because I'm planning on buying gifts pre-made, instead of making them. I guess I just don't feel like I have the energy or inspiration to make anything this year.
"If you said goodbye to me tonight,
there would still be music left to write.
What else could I do?
I'm so inspired by you,
that hasn't happened for the longest time."
I feel like I need that person in my life.
"What can you do when your dreams come true,
and it's not quite like you planned?
What have you done to be losing the one,
You held so tight in your hand?
...
You're afraid you might fall out of fashion,
and you're feeling cold and small.
Any kind of love without passion,
Ain't no kind of loving at all."
True story.
Lyrics are bombarding me, sorry. I'm going for one more, then back on subject.
"I guess this is our last goodbye,
but you don't care, so I won't cry.
You'll be sorry when I'm dead,
cause all this guilt will be on your head.
I guess you'd call it suicide,
but I'm too full to swallow my pride."
That last bit is just badass. Personal opinion...
All of the above are from memory. I'm proud of me. :D
Okay, I am really ready for gift giving. It's like I'm spending money on me(instead of other peoples rent), but I'm spending it on other people, so it's almost more fun because I don't have to find a place to put my new things. I get to give them to people I -insert word that relates to love/care here- about.
I'm trying really hard to not be really creepy and attached to you folks, but my younger personality is seeping through. I was going to think of an awesome analogy, but when it comes down to it, I just get super attached to people because I'm scared they're going to leave me, so I squeeze all the juice out of it that I can. That fails me in a number of ways: I freak people out, I end up getting hurt, and I exhaust myself/forget to love and care for me. Basically, I'm a creeper.
This is really how my mind works. This is a pretty fluid model of all of the things that have crossed my mind while typing.
-goes to get cola and possibly nachos-
I swapped the nachos out for my Odie Joe. :) He's such a sweetie.
I think I'll turn in so that he can sleep. Goodnight.
Monday, June 7, 2010
I've grown weary of my inability to let go.
We've had the same argument too many times.
Every time, I fight against my better judgement and I always win.
Finished Perks, it's a way easy, super-fast read, but I like it every time.
Still trying to trudge through The Gunslinger. It's really good, but it's really hard to follow sometimes. I guess the more you read the easier it is, but I dunno.
Somehow it took me less time to read The Stand and it was 1000+ pages with font like this. The Gunslinger is 200ish with font like this and I'm struggling to make it through. Super gimp.
I'm turning 19 in less than 2 weeks.
It's my Golden Birthday.
I get a $25 gift card from one of the stores I work at and hopefully will get a few bucks from family. Plus I get paid the Saturday and Wednesday before, so I'm deciding what I want to do with my day.
On the 24th it's the 6 year anniversary of my grandma's death.
I want to go to the graveyard, but I'm thinking about going alone. I have a bad feeling about taking a certain person with me and I don't really want to drag anyone else along.
I saw a picture of her at Pat's last night and I had to cry.
Why do really beautiful people have to die?
I have pretty legitimate gift ideas for our Holiday in July.
I was thinking we could push it to August and have a Holiday/Birthday for ashleigh, but I wouldn't want to make you feel like your birthday is less important.
Really, I just want to give you two gifts at once. :D
I tend to be an over-gifter when I have money, but I doubt I'll hear complaints.
I guess I feel like I owe something to all of you for putting up with me and I'm big on "the Spirit of Giving" and what-not.
Fucking Hallmark...
I think that's all for today.
We've had the same argument too many times.
Every time, I fight against my better judgement and I always win.
Finished Perks, it's a way easy, super-fast read, but I like it every time.
Still trying to trudge through The Gunslinger. It's really good, but it's really hard to follow sometimes. I guess the more you read the easier it is, but I dunno.
Somehow it took me less time to read The Stand and it was 1000+ pages with font like this. The Gunslinger is 200ish with font like this and I'm struggling to make it through. Super gimp.
I'm turning 19 in less than 2 weeks.
It's my Golden Birthday.
I get a $25 gift card from one of the stores I work at and hopefully will get a few bucks from family. Plus I get paid the Saturday and Wednesday before, so I'm deciding what I want to do with my day.
On the 24th it's the 6 year anniversary of my grandma's death.
I want to go to the graveyard, but I'm thinking about going alone. I have a bad feeling about taking a certain person with me and I don't really want to drag anyone else along.
I saw a picture of her at Pat's last night and I had to cry.
Why do really beautiful people have to die?
I have pretty legitimate gift ideas for our Holiday in July.
I was thinking we could push it to August and have a Holiday/Birthday for ashleigh, but I wouldn't want to make you feel like your birthday is less important.
Really, I just want to give you two gifts at once. :D
I tend to be an over-gifter when I have money, but I doubt I'll hear complaints.
I guess I feel like I owe something to all of you for putting up with me and I'm big on "the Spirit of Giving" and what-not.
Fucking Hallmark...
I think that's all for today.
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